I spent the last few weeks feeling outraged. I was feeling furious with the system that we live in and how it has continued to oppress our BIPOC communities. It’s a system that I’ve been fighting against since I was a teen. But honestly, I also spent the last few weeks feeling disappointed in myself. When I was in high school, I was the President of a cultural diversity club and even organized a benefit concert for the Anti-Defamation League. I was passionate about social justice. Then I went to college and while I still organized cultural diversity nights as a Resident Assistant, I stopped being so involved in promoting social justice.
For the last several months, systemic racism and oppression have been on my mind. I thought about how limited our training is in school and in our continued education units in truly addressing cultural competency as a therapist. I’ve been considering how to best address this and change how mental health professionals learn about trauma, anxiety, depression, etc. in order to be more inclusive of all marginalized groups. This need has become especially evident as I’ve seen plenty of microagressions, racism, and microinvalidations in posts from other mental health professionals. They clearly never learned about racial trauma. Now that we are shining a light on systemic oppression, it validates and reignites this interest in being a true agent of change. The question is how?
How do we move from being an ally to becoming a change agent?
The first step for me is to recognize how I have benefitted from the system and how I have been complacent (therefore complicit) in maintaining our status quo of systemic oppression. As a white-passing Latina, I have lived both experiences of being oppressed and benefitting from this system. As one post by Latinx Parenting put it, we have been the colonized and the colonizer, the oppressed and the oppressor. This can feel like a hard reality to accept, but it’s true. In gaining awareness about how I show up to the world and how the world interacts with me, I can find better and more mindful ways to fight prejudice.
Another important step for me is to choose to not “unfriend.” I have seen plenty of posts from people basically stating, “if you don’t like what I say, unfriend/unfollow me.” Yes, boundaries are important. I do not believe that you should continue to allow someone to abuse of you through gaslighting or other more overt methods. Get toxic people out of your life. However, if we all choose to unfollow/unfriend those who differ from us, then the divide between us will become even greater. We cannot learn from one another or influence positive change if we are completely disconnected. This is how we maintain the status quo and continue with the social polarization that we have been experiencing. So, with those that feel “safe” for me to stay connected with, I will do so. I will also continue either reporting anything that promotes hate speech/violence/harassment and engage in dialogue to challenge harmful beliefs.
Honestly, the hope is that someday…maybe…one of my posts about the realities of systemic oppression will click with naysayers. Keeping a connection with people of differing views reminds me of the importance of world travel. The more we expose ourselves to other cultures, the more we learn about others, the more we grow as a person, and the more culturally competent we become. During this time of COVID-19 and limited travel, it seems that maybe online connections are how we can accomplish some of this.
In a recent post by my friend, Iris McAlpin, she encourages others to approach content that you disagree with from a place of curiosity versus defensiveness:
I encourage you to keep this question in mind, of “what can I learn from this perspective, and what does my reaction to it tell me about myself,” the next time you may feel triggered by important posts such as:
Know that the discomfort you might feel in these moments presents you with an opportunity. You can either run and continue to hold on tight to faulty narratives, or you can sit through the discomfort in order to learn. Using this growth mindset can help us to create a more culturally competent and caring community.
I hope that if my posts cause discomfort, that you stick with me. Definitely not because I care about how many “followers” I have, but because I’m here to help. I try my best to be as purposeful and mindful with my words as possible in order to encourage learning and growth. Most importantly, I want to encourage acceptance of others. I want to encourage not only an open mind, but also an open heart for our BIPOC communities. And if this feels too uncomfortable to sit with on your own, know that it is a worthwhile and important topic to take into therapy.
How will you choose to become an agent of change?
